Cops showed up at 4 am to address a noise complaint and she called them pussies for not doing shots with us.
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
Favorite thing said to me in 2012: It's like you have two tongues!
Were you keeping a list?
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
WHY WERE YOU COOKING NAKED?
WHY WERE YOU SLEEPING ON MY COUCH?
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
I gave Sophia a glitter bomb for Christmas. And before you ask is because she pooped in my cat litter box and then drank all my liquor and didn't pay me back and refuses to acknowledge that she had any wrongdoing. So she gets to clean up glitter for the next 10 years.
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