How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
Just pulled over to throw up in a day care parking lot while the kids were outside playing. The adults were mortified.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
If you hear screaming in the middle of the night, bat got loose. Call poison control immediately and explain rabies
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So you drank bourbon with cough syrup?
I still had a cough. It only makes sense
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
Dude. I’m playing chess through iMessage with a stripper. What has my life become.
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
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