One little Beyonce reference and he turns on me faster than liberals on Jon Mackey
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
25 Of The Most Cringeworthy Internet Stalking Fails
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
21 People Who Barely Escaped Death
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
I just realized that you're going to be drunk for daylight savings time again. Godspeed.
I officially have worse injuries from a baby shower than roller derby.