No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk.
i don't think i ever formally apologized for that time i threw up on your dog.... well...here it is...
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
He kept stopping sex to whisper in my ear, and the only thing I could understand was "double stuffed oreos"
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
Went into Walmart to get a pregnancy test. Came out with a beta fish and chocolate.
Got cut off last night cuz this chick had her hands down my shorts and was blatantly playing with my dick while I was trying to order. apparently that's "frowned upon"
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
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