Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
I was so drunk that I didn't realize he was staying at the Waldorf. I walk of shamed the Astoria, do you even know what this means?
Dude. He put me on a rewards point system for his dick. I have to do him favors now to build up to winning sex. This is shit.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
She had YOLO tattooed on her ass. Like, one cheek said YO, the other said LO. Even I can't handle that level of hot mess.
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
I'm shaved like a Brazilian hooker right now.
I have the flu.
I don't give a shit
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
Randomize
