My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
Remind me to tell you the Scottish bar story tomorrow
Remind me to tell you it was a shitty story when you're done telling it tomorrow
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
i just made my gag reflex go away.
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
I just threw out a whole Christmas ham, 12 positive pregnancy tests, 3 empty vodka bottles and by ex boyfriends Latina porn collection in the same garbage bag. The homeless person who goes through the bins tonight knows I have nothing left to loose.
I put you to bed and you would not go unless I let you sleep with the vodka
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
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