i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
Death by dick. An honorable death. Put a picture of his dick in the photo collage at my funeral.
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
