member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
You need to call dibs on the blond with the tits. It's your birthday.
Haha hell yea
Because if someone gets to see those.. It should be you. It's like God telling you Happy Birthday.
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His cat watched us the ENTIRE time. Every time I glanced over the poor kitty looked at me as if I were pelvic thrusting her father to death.
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
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