so i was supposed to be to work at 8..but its 9:15 and im currently standing stoned in the middle of holiday...with a bag with three doughnuts, two redbulls, and a slim jim..
god i miss watching you do this...
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
Wine floats aren't as good of an idea as they seem
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
woke with Taco Bell next to me in bed and people's shoe sizes written on my arm.
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize
