no ping pong balls so we're playing beer pong with an ornament. you can't tell me that's not festive.
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
I stopped in the middle of puking to wish you a happy birthday, so by default it means a lot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
i need to put some appletini on your dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
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