Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
If you don't answer the phone then I will be forced to leave you a wonderful voicemail of me throwing up
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
Apparently I'm not allowed to call at 3am anymore and ask to speak to all his siblings. I was just trying to get to know the family
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
Randomize
