He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
All I could think about when I saw her was that she could be the mother of my future first round draft picks
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
How many more of your relationships do I have to destroy before you realize sleeping with me isn't a good idea?
Don't forget to grab a pregnancy test and sloppy joe mix for tonight
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
Come on in and take your pants off
Randomize