sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
so i woke up this morning covered in mail. none of it is mine.
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
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I swear he shrunk like 2 inches. Remind me that drunk sex needs to remain drunk sex.
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
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I'm closer to stabbing a fork in my neck than finishing this resume.
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
He picked me up in Smart Car with the license plate “MYWHIP.” I think my ovaries shriveled up and died.
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