if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
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I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
This weekend i learned three things 1) skittles in vodka is good 2) it takes more than a roll of quarters to get a cab home 3) never tell a bartender to give you your change in actual change
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
Your ex roommate is making out w the kid who pees on floors and it's kinda funny
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
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