For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
He keeps asking me for girl advice, i told him im an expert at getting drunk, not girls
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
What eyeshadow color says "yes I am at the dentist, and yes I am hungover please don't judge my life choices"
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
Randomize
