Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
my head looks like a cockatoo
mine looks like a lions mane...looks like the entire zoo is going to prom
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize
