yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
Considering that my ex-wife dumped me to become a lesbian, the Universe owes me a threesome.
So I've only had a mustache for about 5 minutes and I'm already pretty sure it's the best decision I've ever made.
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
So last night, I bought mother's day cards and the Plan B pill.
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
I forget how to act sober
Randomize
