what is it about summer that misdirects my moral compass so much?
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
i woke up with a shattered plate next to my head.
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
Just realized I'm marrying a man that's never gone down on me. What happened to my priorities?
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
i like him enough to wash my sheets.. but not enough to finally get that pink lemonade and vodka slushy stain out of my carpet
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
Why did I wake up with a half-eaten burrito and a vaccuum cleaner in my bed? ...on top of me.
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