did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oscar is the man. He keeps getting pictures of hot nude women with messages in spanish saying "i hope you like it" sent to his phone
whose oscar?
the baller who i guess decided to give out a fake number at the bar last weekend. luckily that fake number was mine. i have enough porn to last me until next month.
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
i definitely just woke up with half of a cigarette tucked underneath my balls. Last night must have been interesting
Between my vibrator and my iPhone carpal tunnel is inevitable.
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
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