absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
I was trying to be really smart and save 10 dollars for each cab there and back. ...so I ripped a $20 dollar bill in half.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
Contents of my pockets this morning: phone, condom, one hoop earring, half a cheeseburger, lighter and a $87 receipt from tacobell. Time for work.
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
Randomize
