with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
Woke up in 100% not my clothes this morning. Third time this month. Fuck. Tequila.
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
I don't think the TSA agent thought getting iced while searching my bag was as funny as I did.
You tried to convince our cab driver that your $2 bill was worth $11.70
Last night she showed me how to clean my bowl and now she's drunk making peanut butter filled cookies. Best. Roommate. Ever.
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
I want her autograph on my taint
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
I don't know what weirder, the fact that I flat out said "I thought I deleted you from facebook" or that she responded with "I just hacked your account and readded myself". Never thought I'd say this but I wish drunk me would stop making friends!
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
I don't think it's a coincidence that the day I just happen to do the splits at the gym I come back with 7 guys' phone numbers.
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
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