Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
I feel like our lives always have been and always will be a never ending drunken rampage full of pregnancy scares and lost brain cells
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
Also, next time I go get a wax, I'm gonna ask the girl about the innie to outie ratio she sees on the daily.
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
Normally getting fucked up with the owner and suggesting he motorboat me wouldn’t help my chances of a promotion, but this is 2020 and he definitely enjoyed it
Randomize
