Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(773): View more from Illinois

Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper

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(773): Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper http://tfl.nu/ngxc

Replies (9) Good night (2908) Bad night (582)
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(208): View more from Idaho

Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.

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(208): Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation. http://tfl.nu/cfqm

Replies (20) Good night (4052) Bad night (756)
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(586): View more from Michigan

so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside

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(586): so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside http://tfl.nu/qiju

Replies (4) Good night (3274) Bad night (1295)
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(239): View more from Florida

I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real

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(239): I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real http://tfl.nu/tylh

Replies (5) Good night (4092) Bad night (1209)
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(804): View more from Virginia

well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.

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(804): well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd. http://tfl.nu/39zt

Replies (2) Good night (2635) Bad night (916)
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(219): View more from Indiana

Used my jumper cables as a bottle opener last night. Really pleased with my problem solving skills.

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(219): Used my jumper cables as a bottle opener last night. Really pleased with my problem solving skills. http://tfl.nu/rh2h

Replies (5) Good night (2704) Bad night (791)
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(307): View more from Wyoming

They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.

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(307): They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting. http://tfl.nu/gm65

Replies (7) Good night (2780) Bad night (1227)
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(250): View more from British Columbia

You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.

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(250): You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye. http://tfl.nu/8nzh

Replies (4) Good night (760) Bad night (1233)
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(707): View more from California

Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick

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(707): Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick http://tfl.nu/qfj7

Replies (3) Good night (1664) Bad night (625)
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(781): View more from Massachusetts

MASS TEXT! MASS TEXT! Your sad horny friend has finally gotten it in and can go back to being normal once again. You're welcome.

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(781): MASS TEXT! MASS TEXT! Your sad horny friend has finally gotten it in and can go back to being normal once again. You're welcome. http://tfl.nu/90bv

Replies (14) Good night (2141) Bad night (661)
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(678): View more from Georgia

I woke up in a trash can. Please dude. I don't know what I did to you last night, but I'm sorry. Epically sorry. Please call me back. Please.

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(678): I woke up in a trash can. Please dude. I don't know what I did to you last night, but I'm sorry. Epically sorry. Please call me back. Please. http://tfl.nu/k3b6

Replies (4) Good night (954) Bad night (574)
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(225): View more from Louisiana

The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.

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(225): The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night. http://tfl.nu/csqe

Replies (2) Good night (383) Bad night (615)
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(618): View more from Illinois

ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL

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(618): ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL http://tfl.nu/3dit

Replies (3) Good night (692) Bad night (351)
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(360): View more from Washington

That dude with the beard walked up to me, turned my water into wine with everclear and kool-aid, and walked away. Pretty sure drunk Jesus is back.

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(360): That dude with the beard walked up to me, turned my water into wine with everclear and kool-aid, and walked away. Pretty sure drunk Jesus is back. http://tfl.nu/4p4r

Replies (1) Good night (843) Bad night (267)
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(225): View more from Louisiana

Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it

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(225): Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it http://tfl.nu/edch

Replies (1) Good night (707) Bad night (282)

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