He is such a slut. More and more my type.
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
Just when I thought this night couldn't get any worse, my dad sang and dedicated Sexual Healing to me at kareoke night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
I answered the door to some Jehovah Witnesses hungover and wearing nothing but a white tshirt. I think they made it the church goal to reform me, we've gotten four pamphlets. My mom's going to make me convert if they keep coming.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
Would it be inappropriate to do a science fair project on whether the type of drunk a person is is determined by nature or nurture
dude you're not even a fucking science major
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
Sometimes I wish I lived alone because there would be no one to judge me if I wanted to have whiskey and popcorn for breakfast.
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