I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
I just found out I was conceived in a rehab facility... that's better than finding out your dad could be someone else right?
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
In the middle of the State of the Union, she unzipped my pants and started giving me head. I've never been so proud to be an American.
Ran into his mom at the bar, i told her "i know he's married now but I'd still do him"
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
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