if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
I woke up with my keys safelty pinned to my thong. It's gonna be a great day.
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
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Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
Apparently as she was dragging me out of the club, I was clinching onto this european guy screaming at Jenna: that's the 12th time you've cockblocked me tonight
Priorities: waking up on your doorstep desperately clutching half a meatball marinara but with no sign of your keys, purse or housemate. Where are you?!
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
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I woke up to a shattered My Little Pony garbage pail, a black eye I don't know how I got and no one will look me in the face. Fuck tequila.
I just came so hard my vision went blurry. I can only hope one day I'll find a man that can accomplish what my left hand does on a tri-daily basis.
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
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