But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
he said I was the best sex he's ever had, handed me a burger king crown and told me to take my walk of shame with pride
There's a litter of kittens in my bathtub and beer cans everywhere. I want my apartment key back.
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
He came when Ron Burgundy started playing the jazz flute. How do you think it went?
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
The worst part is there are all kinds of happy creatures out here like fucking snow white and i'm sitting in semi-dead grass, hungover with a burnt butt
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
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