I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad
That's it, I refuse to live in a world where sparkly vampires beat Batman at anything.
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
Opened my purse to realize I have someone else's birth certificate. What happens to me in college?
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
You are in a fancy European city. The best way to truly experience the city is through Tinder
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
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