Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
He googled the address of the bar, then sent me a text saying "6.3 miles. Too far. :( Apparently I am only worth a 5 mile radius.
I don't judge her for getting booty calls at 2 in the morning, so she can't judge me for staying in friday nights and putting spray cheese on pringles.
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
I puked walking onto the plane. How do you think my post-Birthday hangover went?
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
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