I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
i soberly give you permission to do that to me when im drunk
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
I got a lap dance from a guy last night dressed as a school girl. Heels and all. His heels got stuck in my fish nets
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
Well my sober pact lasted almost an hour. Then I did four shots. But in other news, one of those shots I took with a midget. So like I couldn't turn that shit down.
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
returning from a 6am booty call in 2 feet of snow on a Tuesday is a bold new kind of low for me
Oh my god, are you sexting me while watching the Democratic debate.
100%
Now I'll never know if it was me that got you worked up, or Bernie Sanders' social policies.
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize
