glad my latex allergy prevents me from being a one-night stand whore
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At the airport and im So hungover. Think anyone will help if I put a note on me reading "flying to Boston, please wake me as we board" and then passing back out?
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
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