where are you?
sonic
Good. I hungoveredly cleaned your room. This is what being married is going to be like. I pick the condoms up off the floor and you bring home the hot dogs.
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
That freshman kid successfully snuck into a college party, got caught, proceeded to jump out of a second story window without getting a scratch then met up with us a block away and somehow managed to get a bottle of grey goose in the meantime. He is truly blessed by the alcohol gods
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
Typical Sunday morning text...are you alive?
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
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