i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
No, I was feeling sad because all of the other girls were like model-skinny. But then I remembered that I had big boobs and went to hit on their boyfriends.
I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
Just because you put plan b in my Easter basket doesn't give you an excuse not to wear a condom.
Yeah, sam & jessica were trying to have sex and you walked in & started coaching them through it with a fake hulk hogan mustache on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
Is it rude to say "I hate you because you live inside Hillary Clinton's asshole"?
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
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