Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
I told my girl, that I use to jerk off to Star Trek. All she says is, "Oh my gawd, you're such a trekie!". If I was her, I'd be weirded out more than me being a Trek Fan.
Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
It's 3 in the morning and there is a bird chirping it's head off outside. GOD DAMNIT THIS IS NOT A TIME TO SING OF YOUR CHEERFUL BIRD MERRIMENT YOU STUPID BIRD CUNT!
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
Randomize
