Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
Note to self: make sure the door is locked before the handcuffs go on.
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
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