and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
Having kids is risky. They might end up weird.
his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
i know i shouldn't tell you this since i want you to really like me but i just spent the last 4 hours sleeping on the toilet.
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
Getting dome in the backseat of a friends car with Ariana Grande playing in the background was probably the most romantic part of my night
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
I woke up in a boat, with a life jacket on, tons of beer cans and no lake... I was inside a garage. WTF
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