Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
i spent 45 minuets spilling my heart out to him telling him i was in love with this other guy sorry. when i was done he asked me to give him a blow job. i did. i have commitment problems
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
The power of my boobs compel you
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
well, you know. whores of a feather.
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
Dude I left his house at 5:30 a.m. after you peed on his front door and then tried to fight me for my blanket. Don't even do that at my house or I will end you.
hahahahaha. Worst. Text. Ever.
Randomize
