I have demons in me.
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
Your list of "good ideas" thumbtacked to the lampshade last night consisted of nothing but "tampon-pen" with a note indicating that girls could then always have something to write with, even naked.
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
Your dress got me laid by one of Obama's Secret Service members. Patriotic duty, check.
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
Everyone here knows me as 'that chick who will most likely steal your girlfriend'. My 99% success rate tells me this name is acceptable.
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
Randomize
