Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
I think this Canadian beach volleyball player might be my soulmate. We could check each other's shoulders for melanoma.
I love you.
Bad choice
Randomize
