what has become of my life if the best thing thats happened to me this week is that i discovered my cleavage as the best hiding spot ever for weed.
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
What have I told you about trying to use Jesus as your wingman?!
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
Randomize
