I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
How is it that lesbians won't hit on me at a gay club, but they'll hit on me every time I go to Walmart?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
It's sad that my net worth at the moment is 4 beers
Theres a handprint of sauce on my frig, one streaked across my face, a trail of it to my bedroom and sauce all in my bed and i have no idea what the fuck i ate.
Cooked breakfast with his mom this morning...I'm like the housewife of one night stands
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
Still dying that you shit outside
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
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