I saw a sign that said worlds largest frying pan next exit. Way to do your fucking part Iowa.
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
Afterwards the first thing I said was, "You know, you're probably the first guy who has ever gotten laid wearing Star Wars pajama bottoms."
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
Randomize
