He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
Babysitting for someone you accidently sent nudies to is so fucking awkward.
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
Overslept. So hungover. Apparently texting the first person in my contact list the time I would like to wake up is not how the alarm clock in my phone actually works.
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
Woke up this morning with an extra $35 and someone else's ATM receipt. How much did I drink last night?
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
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