I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
19 Of The Creepiest (Most Inexplicable) Things People Experienced
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
What does it say about my expectations if I'm pounding three beers the hour before a date?
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
You knocked on your freshman year room door, told the kids who opened it "I own you", and attempted to force-feed them everclear.
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
Like every two minutes he would pull out and whipser "don't you do it, you bastard" while looking at his penis. His new name in my phone is 'penis whisperer'