Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
I want to leave work and go home and eat Five Guys and masturbate
I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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