dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
I told my mom happy mother's day then rubbed my belly and said "Oh, and happy grandmother's day too..." She started sobbing. You were right, that wasn't the best way to tell her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Today's lesson: while in the shower, one should choose between either drinking OR shaving. Not both.
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not a horrible person, I just see what everyone chooses to politely ignore.. And occasionally say it aloud whilst deeply intoxicated.
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
Seriously, I woke you up with tacos, I think I deserve the best girlfriend ever award
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
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