that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character
We tried to hook you up with a girl but you said you'd rather fuck the large muscular black man because "At least he'd be tight". He was the bouncer, he heard you.
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
Did you ever hear the story about the time I did blow in a bar bathroom with the #1 ranked golfer in the world?
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