you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
Im really high right now and the vending machine is broken and giving out free candy. Please kill me, my life will never get better than this
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
Randomize
