Texts From Last Night

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  (616): View more from Michigan

  You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.

  (248): View more from Michigan

  no

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  (616): You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls. (248): no http://tfl.nu/la9c
  Replies (21) Good night (1003) Bad night (1725)
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  (973): View more from New Jersey

  How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson

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  (973): How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson http://tfl.nu/43b3
  Replies (24) Good night (906) Bad night (2998)
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  (530): View more from California

  you started whispering 'the itsy bitsy spider' while you were putting your hands up my shorts.

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  (530): you started whispering 'the itsy bitsy spider' while you were putting your hands up my shorts. http://tfl.nu/kee8
  Replies (27) Good night (5125) Bad night (2459)
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  (612): View more from Minnesota

  smell my finger.

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  (612): smell my finger. http://tfl.nu/i0ta
  Replies (80) Good night (1688) Bad night (5112)
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  (732): View more from New Jersey

  The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.

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  (732): The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party. http://tfl.nu/2ynx
  Replies (7) Good night (4714) Bad night (757)
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  (707): View more from California

  He doesn't know I'm infertile yet, that's when the sex gets good

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  (707): He doesn't know I'm infertile yet, that's when the sex gets good http://tfl.nu/rj3f
  Replies (19) Good night (5477) Bad night (1112)
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  (919): View more from North Carolina

  I just bought condoms at Big Lots. please save this text so you can laugh at me in 9 months

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  (919): I just bought condoms at Big Lots. please save this text so you can laugh at me in 9 months http://tfl.nu/8o8f
  Replies (10) Good night (2994) Bad night (3674)
• Favorite

  (212): View more from New York

  This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.

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  (212): This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw. http://tfl.nu/6lr3
  Replies (4) Good night (1681) Bad night (773)
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  (352): View more from Florida

  I'm walking home wearing Kermit the frog footie pajamas, carrying a monogrammed shot glass set with my name on it. It's fucking Christmas!

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  (352): I'm walking home wearing Kermit the frog footie pajamas, carrying a monogrammed shot glass set with my name on it. It's fucking Christmas! http://tfl.nu/fx1v
  Replies (4) Good night (1862) Bad night (596)
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  (614): View more from Ohio

  Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though

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  (614): Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though http://tfl.nu/2fqg
  Replies (6) Good night (1200) Bad night (517)
• Favorite

  (515): View more from Iowa

  They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.

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  (515): They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form. http://tfl.nu/tu4k
  Replies (2) Good night (1251) Bad night (502)
• Favorite

  (985): View more from Louisiana

  Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.

  (504): View more from Louisiana

  This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.

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  (985): Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers. (504): This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot. http://tfl.nu/gotr
  Replies (2) Good night (947) Bad night (459)
• Favorite

  (623): View more from Arizona

  I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day

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  (623): I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day http://tfl.nu/dbnn
  Replies (6) Good night (425) Bad night (753)
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  (720): View more from Colorado

  After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one

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  (720): After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one http://tfl.nu/ewhm
  Replies (4) Good night (496) Bad night (319)
• Favorite

  (650): View more from California

  I woke up in a strange bathroom. Was I blonde when you left me last night?

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  (650): I woke up in a strange bathroom. Was I blonde when you left me last night? http://tfl.nu/apf6
  Replies (4) Good night (756) Bad night (556)

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