So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
i waited two years for her to sleep with me. it just didnt seem worth it.
she lost her virginity three hours after you dumped her.
are you serious?
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
So then the officer asked you how you were getting home and you told him "very carefully"
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
Im sorry for drunkenly throwing your phone into the ocean. At the time it seemed like a good way for you not to text him
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
Randomize
