Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
Question #1: Why am I on my living room floor? Question #2: Where did the bloody footprints come from? Question #3: Why are there two McChickens next to the wine bottle?
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The Wolf of Wall Street “I ain’t fuckin’ leaving!” speech when the cops broke up your party though...
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
Okay, this next statement may sound like a red flag but I'm tellin you, shotgunning those two beers really helped me love my child more effectively. Honest.
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
Randomize