Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
What's the polite way to say "hey I don't actually want to fuck you, I just swiped right on you because you didn't like me in high school and I needed validation"
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
let your parents know i'm sorry i ran around the house pretending their metal detector was a "booze detector"
Randomize
